You may be one of us

But which one of us are you?

In my second year in China, I knew my colleagues, but there were a couple I seldom saw above once every two weeks. They had their timetables, I had mine, and there was little overlap.

Now that there are about twenty-five of us there are some colleagues whom I almost never see, and some whose names I don’t know, and some whom I almost never see and whose names I don’t know. There are also several to whom I’ve said nothing or next to nothing.

Should I be concerned?

I think there are too many of us for us to be a cohesive unit. I think splitting us into subject groups might have been practical, but it also sets fault lines in place. Last year the office had a mix of English teachers and scientists, which led to some weird and wonderful conversations that you wouldn’t tend to get under other circumstances. The new office may come together eventually, but I need some allies.

I suspect that the place is like a school staffroom filled with people who, whether they like it or not, have been gulled into believing all that government propaganda about how important school teachers are. There’s still that cynicism which seems to be an inherent characteristic of teachers, but there’s also the whiff of pedagogical seriousness that I lack because haven’t been through the brainwashing and I just don’t feel that what I do has any real value.

Does my teaching make any real difference or do students potter through getting their real English from their Chinese teachers while I do, er, something with them?