Occasional Tales

That was the week that was. And the series. From the picture, I guessed that the treasure hunt required you to three-star a speed trap in the McLaren F1 GTR (or whatever it’s called). I did it. I got my treasure. And then the game informed me several times that I’d completed the treasure hunt, especially as I went through the speed zone on the motorway. I had the message about give times, and I may be a decrepit old nitwit, but even I don’t need to be reminded of this so many times. The weekly in the 812 Superfast was a doddle. Good car, too. Nice to drive. I did the photo shoot in the Aventador J, which is another Lamborghini that I don’t drive often enough. The jump into Mulegé was a colossal pain because although I was getting the distance, the car kept going nose down, arse up and flipping when it landed (no, aero was not always co-operative). In the end I managed to keep the car flat and get it to land in a gap. I managed to PB the speed trap and the speed zone without intending t...

 I began with the vagaries of the treasure hunt, taking a guess that we were meant to win (?) a road race in a track toy. The weekly started without any problems, but the outcome of the race at the drag strip didn’t register until I clicked on the tile and scrolled through the events. This was a task that should’ve taken about ten minutes in total, but the bug delayed my glorious progress. The Eventlab tile was text-free again, but was live once I left my home. Five laps was a bit much on a surface that didn’t seem best suited to overpowered cars. I PB’ed the jump by miraculously dodging the trees, and one-shotted the speed trap and drift zone. I disliked the game originally forcing players to use a particular type of car in the worst possible class, but I wish it would do PR stunts like Horizon 4, leaving me to choose the car. In spite of the car exploiters in their Bone Shakers in Horizon Open, I managed to come 2nd round Plaza Circuit, which I attributed to my preference for car...

More or less painful. I started with the Horizon Promo or whatever it’s called these days, and did the daily at the same time. The weekly challenge probably took about ten minutes unlike the FH4 weekly which had to be grindy just to be a pain. I PB’ed the speed trap, but the SWS was rubbish. The Trailblazer is the easiest one in the game, and the SWS was not quite rubbish. The speed zone was a pain. I tried the MB CLK-GTR because of the grip and turning, but it lacked the speed. I ought to have opted for the Rimac, but the Jesko managed to com­plete the task – eventually – and PB it. Another sort of all right SWS. I hated every loathsome minute of Street’d Lightning . If I wanted to race in the dark, I’d stick a paper bag over my head or switch my monitor off. At the end of it, I got a wheel spin – a rubbish wheel spin. Buggy Bug World featured cheating drivatar bastards. I opted for my B700 Alumi Craft Class 10 which is a decent off-roader, but the races got to Guanajuato and a bunch...

“You have been disconnected. No Horizon Arcade for you.” I started with the treasure hunt, which seems to have been near miss skills of some sort. Easy money. The weekly challenge was in the Ariel Atom, which is a car I like albeit one that tends to be a little floaty. More easy money. Horizon promo was also easy money (natch), which reminds me that in spite of my best efforts, I still haven’t seen the new Audi. Eventlab (1), Windy City, was dark, wet and had boost pads where they ought not to have been. Ugh. Eventlab (2), Mulegé Outskirts, was all right in the FE 911 GT3 RS, but the wriggly boarded bits were a pain in the arse. New rivals. Dunas Blancas in the STO. The car seemed fairly planted, but slid a bit. I thought it was AWD, but discovered afterwards that it was RWD. Decent handling, but I haven’t given it a proper go yet. A lot of whining about it being yet another Huracán, which is not, I admit, without some justification considering this update was the perfect opportunity f...