Occasional Tales

I started with the weekly in the 1997 Honda Civic Type R, being spared the treasure hunt. I did Mulegé as the road race and had a painful couple of first laps. The hard charger skill remains a mystery. I overlarded the car with power and somehow achieved this randomly achieved skill. For the first two PR stunts I went with the 1993 Nissan Skyline. For the jump, keeping to the road seemed best with early turn-in on that slight sharp right-hander ahead of the jump. The SWS was two-thirds excellent. I one-shotted the speed trap, following the road and being careful on the approach. Rubbish SWS. The game decided – as I tried to do the speed zone in vain – that it ought to go CTD on me. I restarted and switched to the ever reliable Nissan Pulsar for another rubbish SWS. I took a photo. I got a stupid horn. I ran down some VCR tapes and got another horn. I am a mediocre player. Hear me squeak! Eventlab (1). JCO Project Race 3 Airport . Another bloody night race, but excellent use of props a

With a semi-slick excursion. A comment in a recent video by Alex “FailRace” Day had me thinking that I ought to see whether off-road race tyres are all they’re cracked up to be in dirt races. I started by doing five trail races on dirt tyres followed by the same five on off-road race tyres to see whether the latter had a significant effect on the times. I used my Fiat Abarth 131. PI S1 820 (dirt tyres) or S1 808 (off-road). 422hp, 915kg, PWR 0.461. Front 56%. Times in […] are my lead over the drivatars at the end of the race – where I remembered to note them. Baja California Dirt: 02:21.817 [+2] Off-road: 02:17.020 [+4] Barranca Dirt: 02:24.321 [+8] Off-road: 02:25.668 [+7; scrappy race somewhat skews this result] Tulum Dirt: 02:55.251 [+6] Off-road: 02:54.474 [+4; not such a great improvement] Cordillera Dirt: 02:54.062 [+4] Off-road: 02:50.844 [+5] Tapalpa Dirt: 02:15.293 [+8] Off-road: 02:15.983 [+8] The results are variable with off-road races tyres sometimes having a clear advanta

No seasonals this week as I see no point in doing a bunch of races for cars that I have, have more than one of, and probably don’t want yet again. Also, with particular reference to this week, Street Scene is being overdone. I had to build the car from scratch for the treasure hunt only to pick a sketchy, fog-enshrouded Jungle Descent as the Street Scene race in a monstrously fast car with somewhat iffy handling. Another CR90,000. O thou veriest wit, game. Rather annoyingly I repainted one of my three Diablos before doing the weekly. I slightly altered the colour. Yet another Street Scene race. I chose Highland Climb which the Diablo aced even though the handling was rather dubious. I discovered that I have two Lotus Carltons and have driven neither. Took a picture. I’m sure the reward was something naff. Eventlab (1). Horizon Wave Circuit . Nighttime again. Props brilliant, but the circuit was bloody awful, not actually running back into itself, but looking like it was on the minima

Treasure hunt. Drive ugly, fake Mustang from the 1990s. Win CR90,000. Oh, ha ha. Rivals. Subaru SVX round Emerald Circuit . Horrible gears stock. Then Chihuahua in the Soarer. Horrible gears and terrible handling. Both cars about as exciting as cold spam fritters on a grey Sunday morning. Weekly in the Ferrari F50. This is a car I like, but I think I need to rebuild it. No probs with the various tasks. I took a snap of the 22B-STi. I got some ghastly clothing that makes me look like one of those poor unfortunates outside shops handing out flyers or scaring small children in a vain attempt to seem cuddly. I did the Eliminator. Even got to 11th before someone provided me with the keys to my freedom. I think I might add this to my list of things to shun. Actually, I almost got timed out when I wandered into Guanajuato looking for a car drop, and the barrier went whizzing past me. I started the PR stunts in the Elise GT1, but switched to the overpowered Cerbera. I eventually managed to PB

The treasure hunt was a picture of a car with the big pyramid in Teotihuacán in the background. This week the treasure was at the end of the off ramp from the upper part of the maze into which I hop I’ve indifferently ventured for the final time. I haven’t driven the Jaguar E-Type in ages, but the tasks were straightforward. I one-shotted the speed trap in the sketchy Monza SP2. Two-thirds good SWS. The speed zone was as ever an enormous, time-wasting, sodding pain in the arse. I tried various cars, but as usual the real issue was that last short turn which I was forever 1kmh off until randomly, the Forza gods permitted my F50 (S1 878) to attain the necessary speed. One-third very good SWS, but that’s hardly compensation for the amount of time it took. Eventlab (1). Green Plains Motor Raceway was a good-sized, old-style circuit with a nice, sweeping layout. None of the frequent 2nd gear/3rd gear stuff we’ve seen in other Eventlab races. One-third very good SWS, and one-third good. Eve