Occasional Tales

As I discovered when I did the treasure hunt, the car had to specifically be a hot hatch, and I could do the jump in either direction. It was easier to jump down onto the slipway. But then I got multiple messages about solving the treasure hunt even after I’d been to the front garden of Lugar Tranquilo and claimed my treasure chest. The photo of the week was straightforward. Speaking of photos, I found there was a new car I hadn’t photographed. I thought I had the lot. The Eventlab tiles were broken again. It’s been awhile, but there was no text and clicking on them got the usual message about the content being unavailable. Worse than that, the folder where the Turn 10 Temp Scratch folder used to be seems to have vanished in W11. But when I got home this afternoon, the Eventlab events were live. Marchenhaft Bergpass was a decent circuit, but shame about the awful surface. Got a Mustang RTR Spec 5 out of it, so can’t complain. Tokyo Bay Drift was also good, with its NFS feel and one-t

As the game enters the terrible twos… I’m surprised we didn’t get something to celebrate the 2nd anniversary of FH5, and the date rather passed me by. Two years on and I’m disconnected in free roam over 99% of the time. I see there’s another HA as a daily. The last time we had and HA, it took three days (?) before I had a brief window of opportunity in which to complete it. Mostly it takes several attempts to connect to the Eliminator, the Trial, and Horizon Open/Tour (although today I managed this feat first time). Two years on and I’ve only just reached prestige 6 (in FH4, which I don’t play for such sustained periods, I think I’m already halfway to prestige 8). Although the range of cars is vast, I feel there are far too many of them, leading to neglect (I’ve briefly driven the F8 Tributo, but have done nothing else with it) or confusion in that a seasonal demands a certain sort of car, I look at the range of available models and shrug because I don’t know which one the game really

Antique bangers. I started the playlist with a crash. The game got to the playlist screen, I nudged my mouse slightly, and FH5 went CTD on me. When I returned, I started with the treasure hunt by driving along the beach on the west side of the map in search of a volleyball net, accidentally grazing one and completing the task. The treasure is round the back of Buenas Vistas. I opted for the 1975 Bronco for the weekly. It was a sound choice, but I ought to has specced it up for the seasonal in the Titan so that I could cover the cross country race and the seasonal championship in one go. I used a stock Lexus RC F for Midtown Urban City (a name which now that I look at it is a tautology since “Midtown City” or even “Midtown” would be sufficient). I couldn’t be bothered rebuilding and retuning my other RC F to meet the requirements. It was an actual race, but it was long and twisty, being yet another tiresome start-stop sort of course. In one section I was permanently in second. Admitted

As there was no treasure hunt this week (Omnes [but insincerely]: Shame!), I started with the weekly in the 2018 Mustang. For the danger sign task I went to the top of the volcano because every time I tried the motorway or Festival site jumps, the car went arse over tit (as we say in the vernacular). We had to have a Street Scene race as well, didn’t we? (Scream.) I managed to do the HA without any fuss or bother. Yes, dear reader, I was actually online in free roam. It didn’t last. The first Eventlab was Crop Circle Stadium Rally , which was sort of like a drift zone, which seemed to be rather irritating until… Eventlab (2), which necessitated a trip to Eventlab Island for some race which was on a decent enough circuit, with the annoying dial being set to maximum. And just to dump a turd into my bowl of irritation soup, the SWS was bloody rubbish. Never mind, the photo made it all… worse, forcing me to start a Street Scene race (scream!) to take a picture of my Camaro ZL1 1LE, and rew

And the new sprint races. Yes, of course I bought the new car pack. We start with the 2020 Chevrolet Silverado (tuning 1/9; no surprise). As my test, I took it up the volcano, but as I guessed, I needed to crab it to get it to the top. I upgraded it to S1 class and took it out in the Titan , but in spite of a solid win, I’d say it was probably better to have taken it to the top of A class. In truth, this doesn’t seem to offer anything that the plethora of overweight, American agricultural barges don’t already offer. I was expecting the Czinger C21 (tuning 8/9; but not gears) to be overpowered and underhandling (neologism © Me, 2023), but it was overpowered and grippier than a limpet. As a test, I took it down the motorway towards the start of Descansar Dorado , which is preceded by a corner where cars are prone to understeer at speed. I took the turn in the stock Czinger without even lifting off. I got 366kmh down the motorway. HW Goliath 14:58. I think I’ve done that race in under 15

Or, The Antiques Roadshow, US edition. Let’s start with the Autoshow Car Vouchers, which seems to be a cynical cash grab. The target cullies are, I assume, the Game Pass brigade who contribute so little financially to MS’s vast money bins, but are probably the players who turn up on Facebook wanting to know how to make more money because they can’t be bothered doing races to earn the credits they need. Mind you, this could also be used by new players to get the Autoshow cars that barely if ever turn up in wheel spins without spending vast sums on them. FH4 suffered from there being a number of expensive cars that were never playlist or wheel spin rewards. And then there’s new DLC car pack. Yes, I’ll cave and buy it, but only for the Saleen S7 LM. I don’t want some ridiculous hot rod van, another obese agricultural barge, or some obscenely overpowered hypercar that’s only good for PR stunts. As for the rest, it’s mostly like the Antiques Roadshow. The series cars are a pair of shrugs. T

Mostly a doddle. I decided to use my 1993 Skyline GT-R for the Trial because it has the best PWR of the cars which were eligible for this championship. The GT-R LM was also a popular choice. In spite of mostly going smoothly, there were some incidents. I was doing quite well in Cruce de Valle until I took the turn to the bridge that crosses the motorway, where I found an SUV mostly blocking my path. I pinged off it and off the road, driving across the motorway and up the far slope, bouncing over the crest to land just ahead of the checkpoint. I’m not sure how many places I lost, but I still managed to come 3rd. This leads to the second incident of this race. I’m coming up to the finish, but see two coaches stopped on the road ahead of me into which two drivatars had crashed and were stuck. Easy 3rd. Thanks for the assistance, long-distance coach services. I got up to 3rd in Granjas de Tapalpa , although my teammate ahead of me seemed a little inexperienced. There’s a short S-section w

I won, and everyone else is a DNF. A most curious tale to be told this week of my unexpected triumph in Horizon Open. But as usual, we start with the treasure hunt, which was a matter of amassing skill points until the task was complete. Easy money again. The weekly in the Meyers Manx was straightforward. I heard from the forums that there was some issue with the danger sign challenge, but I did three or four and completed that. The first Eventlab event, Hell’s Mulegé City Circuit , has potential, but the wrong weather, and we didn’t need the lampposts down the middle of the track. I also didn’t need the utterly rubbish SWS. The other Eventlab event, Vulcan Raceway , was another circuit with potential, but the prize was rubbish. I managed to one-shot all the PR stunts in my 2022 VW Golf. The SWSs were all one-third good. The photo. The answer is Guidelines. Yes, that’s where portrait mode is, just where no one would think to look for it because it should be under Orientation. If I hadn