FH5, Series 28, Week 1

Let the bugs begin.

I went over to the stadium which was empty apart from an icon marking Winter Wonderland. I clicked on it, and the Forzathon shop appeared. I sent someone an Alfa Romeo TZ2 as a gift before a bunch of props appeared and I fell through the ground. I reset my car, but was still trapped inside the barrier and had to fast travel to safety. The introductory announcement is being repeated each time I start the game.

The treasure hunt seemed to be a matter of driving up the Volcán Sprint until some random point.

I was online in free roam, which meant I was able to do an HA. As it turned out, I did the HA while a bunch of freeloaders who lurked elsewhere waited till the time ran out. If I’d had another minute I would’ve been able to get it all done, but the task was complete even though all three rounds weren’t.

I think this was the first weekly in a car that I actually like – the 2016 Cayman GT4. The Winter Wonderland Circuit is as bad as I feared. Might make a good carting track. I at least managed to one-shot the speed zone.

Eventlab (1), Pie de Volcán, was good with its slightly foxed appearance. It’s a pity the stock tracks in the game couldn’t have that same sort of motorsport style.

Eventlab (2), Outskirts Scramble, was another quality example of what can be done in Eventlab. I chose the Colin McRae Focus RS and got a one-third good SWS.

I took a photo. I got a silly horn. Do the children really like this sort of infantile nonsense?

I one-shotted the danger sign in the 1989 Toyota MR2, but the SWS was terrible. I got the speed zone in the Fiat 124 by heading westwards to get a more effective run-up. One-third good SWS. I knew what to do about the speed trap (head up the hill from the ford) and specced up the 2014 Golf accordingly.

It’s time once again for Rivals. The first event was Marigold in one of the dreadful barges from the Fast and Furious pack. Advertising, I suppose. The watchword was “caution” because I expected the fat, wobbly-arsed car to go sliding sideways. The second event was Winter Wonderland in the 2022 Subaru BRZ, which was further confirmation that the track is awful, but the car seems good.

Play it Forward was a Street Scene championship (heart sinks), C600 (heart sinks further), in FWD cars (Slough of Despond). I picked the Ford Racing Puma which proved to be quite sound. No, I have little experience with FWD cars in the game, hence my diffidence.

I went for an old FH4 favourite of mine, the Range Rover Sport SVR, for When Nature Calls. No problems.

For Greatest Brits! I picked the Lotus Exige. Should I have picked something else? Quite possibly. The car was annoyingly understeery, but perhaps I was expecting a little too much agility out of it.

As I already had an A800 2020 Supra, I thought the HW PR stunt would be easy enough. No, I had to rebuild it. Gearbox, diff, and as much engine as possible. A one-third excellent SWS.

Too Hot to Handle. I suppose the boring, exploiter choice was the Bone Shaker, but I assumed that the tracks were dirt/off-road and picked the Rip Rod. After the first race, I slapped aero on because the nose was rather floaty. I just won the final race from some pesky Bone Shaker and got a 2018 718 Cayman GTS. As I’ve said before, stick the engine from the 911 in it, and you have a much better car.

I managed to one-shot the desert speed zone in Sierra Nueva, although I was expecting to have to repeat the process several times.

The Lancia Delta Integrale was my weapon of choice for Reap the Rewards. The Lancia 037 Stradale was a prize pain i’ th’ arse. Two road races and one dirt, which meant adjusting the build and the tune. The reward was a dreary 2001 Audi RS4 Avant.

For once I didn’t have to try several times to join the Trial. There’s not much to tell. I thought I came 3rd in Los Jardines, but came 2nd (Forza counting). The start of the race had been a little messy, but I managed to extricate myself from the melee. The hairpin in Mulegé did for a bunch of players, and the lead player and I managed to pass the remaining drivatars on the 2nd lap before he suffered death-by-street-furniture, and I went on to win.

FH5, E is for anodyne… I mean, everyone. Except this week’s Horizon Open. I loathe slingshot challenges as dailies in FH4, but making that a challenge in Horizon Open constitutes cruel and unusual punishment. I know some players have a reasonable chance of achieving this, while a lot of us have no chance of achieving it at all ever. Besides, I’m more likely to crash into another player if I’m trying some puerile overtaking manoeuvre. “Hola, muchachos. Tonight’s main story on Nuevas de Mexico, ageing idiot causes 97-car-pileup trying a slingshot manoeuvre…”