FH5, Series 28, Week 3

But first some news from last week.

I was unable to do last week’s HA as a daily till yesterday. I spent 11 fraught minutes hoping that I wasn’t going to be disconnected. I also switched HAs when I got the impression that I might be dealing with a freeloader. Job done. But HAs should not be dailies since the connectivity is so appallingly bad.

I started with the treasure hunt. I crashed about in the AMC Rebel. The treasure was placed in a position which provoked annoyance.

I had an issue with the weekly. You had to drive 8.0 km, but my 3-Eleven refused to register more than about 100m. I think the problem was from fast travelling to claim a gift (that I could then pass on to some “new” player) because when I switched to my other Lotus 3-Eleven, the process resumed. The game then crashed when I went to Casa Bella to upgrade the car. The rivals challenge was a nuisance because I’m running out of races where I’m put up against the slowest time.

I took a picture of the Morgan Aero GT, which is a much nicer vehicle than that idiotic-looking three-wheeled clown car. When are we going to get the Morgan Aero Supersport? (Side note: drove it in FH4 just recently; bloody awful; I don’t remember it being bloody awful.)

Eventlab (1). Cabo Snow Christmas Circuit. B700 Scirocco. Not as good as the previous two Eventlab circuits, and the reward was shite.

Eventlab (2). Mike Getz wishes Feliz Navidad. I opted for the newer Alumi Craft. Night race, figure eight, some chaos, not especially fun. Rubbish SWS, but got a car to give away.

The speed trap was a pain because it was clear that the Fiat 124 Spider had to be all engine and no common sense; and then the Forza gods thought it’d be the most larks and japes to make sure that traffic got in the way and strategically irritated me. The trick was to get the final corner right – assuming some half-witted AI wasn’t getting in the way. One-third good SWS. The speed zone was another exercise in much the same. The answer seemed to be AWD, widest tyres, most engine and aero. Downhill because the car doesn’t have the grip uphill. Extremely vexatious and not the remotest amount of fun. The SWS was absolute rubbish. However, I managed to one-shot the Trailblazer without the car getting flung about as you cross the road towards the finish and got an SWS that was one-third excellent.

Horizon Open in the International Scout. I started with a second race and ought to have won, but dozy old bugger that I am, I tried to be Mr Precision-Checkpoint just near the end of Ribera Rocosa. However, the next race was the Stadium Cross-country Circuit. I managed to catch the Exocet that was in the lead, but there wasn’t quite enough race left for me to snatch a win – or so I thought. My opponent decided to do a victory spin as he crossed the line, but he spun too soon and I stole the win from him by less than a whisker.

In spite of being online in free roam earlier, it took several attempts to join the Trial. I went with my 2016 BMW M2 because I like the car. AWD because of Línea Costera and the Volcán Sprint. I came 4th in the former probably because some clown in an Sl65 AMG rammed me into a wall and I lost too much speed and time to be able to pass the drivatar ahead of me. Said clownboy was alongside me on the grid for the Volcán Sprint. First section was the usual mess, but I managed to weave my way through most of the field up to third, eventually passing the two drivatars ahead of me. I was keeping an eye on the map in case my friend in the SL65 came screaming up behind me. I was also keeping an eye on the team scores. You see, I was winning the race, but the team was apparently losing, and seemed to have lost until the announcer said we’d won. Oh well, that’s Forza maths for you.

Ice Ice Fairlady was one of those seasonals where the category of cars is uselessly vague. It said Nissan Z which, I assumed, meant that podgy little Nissan Z. When I started the first race, I found that it meant any Nissan Z such as the 370Z, which I would prefer to have been driving. I persisted with the Nissan Z, but got severely pestered in the final race. I got a 2018 Honda Civic. Shrug.

C600, classic muscle, only one choice – the Holden Torana. Feeling Santamental had to include Panorámica. Great. The reward was a 2011 Ford F-150 Raptor. I’ve never driven my original one and see no point as the 2019 F-150 is a sound piece of kit (as was proved just recently in Sierra Nueva). Also, American Automotive is so last series.

For Merry NSXMas I drove my Acura NSX (as did all the drivatars; copycats). Actually, I somehow have four of them. “How?” you ask. Er… I reply. Another great sprint race – Reservorio which I both won and loathed at the same time. I got an excellent wheel spin from Aeródromo, but the win from Gran Pantano was a very close-run thing. The prize was an old Porsche 911.

I wondered what to do about the HW PR stunt. RWD? No aero? I kept hitting 373m and wondered about an engine swap. It worked – just. One-third all right wheel spin.

I picked the 2015 Corvette for Modern Solutions because it’s a good car. Mine was RWD, but I thought I’d try it anyway. Big mistake. I lost too much time at the start of the race bringing it under control, and swapped to AWD. All good apart from a very close sprint race. The prize was a Holden Monaro. I don’t mind if the Old Banger Museum asks for it back.

The Sierra Nueva PR stunt was a speed trap in another antique banger, which I managed to one shot. The SWS was a third all right.

Get to Grits was one of those races that 12-year-olds must love because they can drive unsuitable cars in inappropriate races. I chose my Porsche Macan since this was dirt racing, and after the first race switched to proper dirt tyres partly because of races with tarmac sections. Hmmm. Perhaps not a great choice, but people who think off-road race tyres are the best for this sort of racing are, I feel, spouting a bunch of camel puke. The reward was another car the ought to have been left behind with the previous series.

Yes, I have had a brief play with the Aston Martin Valkyrie. Tuning is 7/9 (but haven’t fiddled with it) and car mastery includes a 200% XP bonus. Must take it round the HW Goliath.

Unlocked, but forgot the new BRZ. Must have a play with that, too.