FH5, Series 36, Week 3

 I happened to remark to Fitztalbot (I was at the club) that there was no treasure hunt in FH5 this week. “None?!” he spluttered. “Disgraceful!” I know he enjoys the treasure hunt, but I can’t understand his enthusiasm for it.

And so I started this week’s Festival playlist with the weekly challenge in the 2010 Nissan 370Z. I more than passed the drift target in two runs along one of the more benign drift zones. I resorted to another Street Scene event to deal with Rivals. I had 4½ hours to complete Cañón Run. Seriously, the worst time was 4½ hours, and it was flagged. Does the game not time players out?

I one-shotted the speed trap for a two-thirds good SWS. The speed zone took a couple of goes and requires finesse in a car which it wasn’t possible to build properly. (I get a bit annoyed with stock+ cars for PR stunts and seasonals.) Rubbish SWS. The drift zone also took a couple of attempts. I almost got it the first time, knew the target was 75,000pts, thought I had it, and missed by 919pts. Another rubbish SWS. Well, it was rubbish drifting.

Photo. Clothing, Ridiculous.

It was after I smashed the coffee cups that I got the new MX-5 RF. I’ve had a little play with it, but no more than that. Tuning 1/9. Perks – rubbish. Roof animation – 10/10.

Horizon Open. Holy buggery, Batman. Which complete and utter plank thought that forcing players to try and get six ultimate speed skills in Horizon Open was a good idea? My races were Tierra Próspera (perhaps at a pinch), Cathedral (not bloody likely), and the Volcán Sprint (also not bloody likely). But as I was doing these, I realised there was an answer – the HW expansion. Job done. I also unlocked an accolade and won the championship. I was racing against a player in the Gordon Murray T.50. Faster than me, but lost two races through poor cornering. I wonder whether PGG was looking at the stats for the accolades and noted that the one for ultimate speed skills in Horizon Open was a little low. To be honest, this was another reminder about my general dislike of OP cars on non-motorsport circuits.

And since I was on the HW expansion, I decided to do the PR stunt. I ended up building the sketchiest 2018 Audi TT RS – engine swapped with off-road race tyres – to exceed the target speed by about 50kmh. And I had to waste CR91,000 on it, but got a wholly excellent SWS.

Time to Play had to include that damnable Waterslide race. Round Nexus what came second? A blasted FE Meyers Manx. How the sodding hell is that even possible? #DrivatarCheatmobile

It was then back to Mexico for the two seasonals. Be a Good Sport. Street Scene (yes, I’m making a face). I went with the 2000 Nissan Silvia, which was all right, but Carretera wasn’t fun. #DrivatarCheatfest

A Mug-nificent Collection was racing in, er… I found that the AR 33 Stradale was eligible, but the races included the intensely irritating circuit inside the stadium. If I’d know that, I would’ve gone AWD. As it was, I just won. I shouldn’t be “just winning”.

As you might guess, the Eventlab tiles weren’t working again until I’d restarted the laptop.

Eventlab (1). Plynthcraft Race 2. Another race that involved a novelty car category. I guessed that the Isetta would be eligible on this not especially interesting track that looked like it’d escaped from Quake II. The SWS was rubbish.

Eventlab (2). Calypso Coastline. BMW 850 CSi round this good, intermediate-length circuit. Effective use of props as well. Pity the reward was naff.

Eventlab (3). Grounds Raceway GP. Another go-kart track, but in S1 900 modern supercars. Gears: 2 - 3 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 3 - 2 (repeat ad iracundiam). The Ferrari 430 Scuderia is a decent reward.

The Trial. Back row start round Plaza Circuit, but came 2nd with a team win. I ended up 5th round Playa Azul partly because of carnage at the start of the race which I was unable to avoid, and then the player ahead of me who couldn’t take corners to save his life. I managed to pass him, but the rest of the field was a long way ahead of me. Team win for a 2016 Dodge Viper.

The RA PR stunt ended up being one of those things that the Forza gods graciously permit you to complete on your nth attempt even though it seems to be nothing special. Another excellent SWS.

I went with the 2004 Hond Civic Type R for In the Hot Seat. C600 (scream!) The main problem with the car was the understeer and then some. I had to rewind several times in one race because there was a 90° right-hander where I wasn’t turning right. On the sharper corners and hairpins I took to handbrake turns. Got myself a third Ariel Nomad.

I have had a go with the VW SP2. It’s all right, but nothing great, and it’s certainly not terrible. The ride height is ridiculous, making the car look like an off-roader. The wheels are outsized (cf. the Lotis Elan), but the overall design has promise. I probably won’t ever drive the car again, but I don’t regret its addition to the game.