FH5, Series 51, Week 2

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The weekly in the Audi S1 was unremarkable. I suspect I haven’t touched the car since the last time this was the weekly challenge.

I went on to the PR stunts. I one-shotted the DS and got a one-third good SWS. I took a guess that you were supposed to use the Taycan ST for the ST on the motorway. I well exceeded the target speed for a one-third good SWS. And then the wheels fell off with the ultra annoying Barranco TB. Which complete bloody noddy thought that starting a TB with a bunch of concealed rocks was a good idea? Or the path through the trees at the bottom? This was one of those PR stunts which quickly becomes a monstrous time suck, and natürlich, I had to be rewarded with a crappy SWS.

Took a picture at the airfield and got an emote. O precious gift of the game, how others shall admire me for my Cool Moves™. [Be quiet, you blithering ass. –ed.]

Eventlab. Caldera Mountain Climb. Use of props, very good. Circuit, good on a mostly flat surface, but not so great on the side of a mountain with some long, blind jumps. Drivatars, confused (as I recall them being on the previous occasion). Night, no thanks.

I eventually managed to do an HA without having to waste a lot of time for it to start.

The HW PR stunt was a nuisance because it was night and because it was difficult to see where to aim to avoid the trees. The SWS was rubbish again.

The RA PR stunt was the DS that you approach from the riverbed. I eased off the throttle a bit as I approached the jump and managed not to completely miss the ramp. I soared like Icarus and came to earth richly rewarded with a new PB and a one-third good SWS.

The stock 2016 BMW M2 was a somewhat choice for this week’s Trial, although it was still a bit of a barge, which I couldn’t chuck round corners with gay abandon [I don’t think you can say “gay abandon” in the 21st century. –ed.] I managed a 4th round Plaza after finally overtaking a couple of annoying drivatars. Ditto Sierra Verde, and the whole business was over. There were a couple of laggards, but their impact was insignificant. I managed to take the dreaded first corner of Sierra Verde without any issues. I find that I now have four BMW i8s, two of which have the custom liveries, although I can’t recall how I acquired the second one. A gift, I guess. I should pass it on. Not a car I drive much if ever. I’ve seen one in real life, but didn’t feel inspired, and from what I’ve heard, the car was never a great success.

I rebuilt the car into low S1 class afterwards and took it for a few races. It’s a decent car to drive once the handling’s been fixed.

The Backstage Pass is a shrug. I would slightly incline to the BRAT, which is a decent off-roader, but I shan’t be bothering as neither pairing has that necessary desirability in my mind.

I’ve been doing some more Horizon Tours this week. Fun when I’m not tired; not fun when I’m tired. I still think this game mode is a good idea in that it places more constraints on races unlike the FFA, exploiterfest that is Horizon Open. On the other hand I’d prefer HTs to be more like the Trial with actual fast travelling to the next race instead of driving between events, which doesn’t really achieve anything. If HTs survive in FH6, I don’t expect this’ll change.

I assume that a lot of new players on PS5 started doing HTs, but many of them turned up in stock cars because unlike more experienced players, they didn’t have the requisite range of vehicles in their garages.

But sometimes HTs attract the Horizon Open try-hards, who seem to be there to compensate for their small genitals.

And finally (as Trevor McDonald used to say) are we at long last going to get some concrete announcement about FH6 next week?

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