Occasional Tales

No delays. Unlike previous experiences in China, my departure from Fuzhou proceeded without any hiccups and a little good fortune. Internet access and a land line were already live, so none of this nonsense about China Telecom using a debt of ¥3 to cut off the phone and demand a bunch of money to get a new line installed. The flat's all right, but there are downsides. The view is awful; the shower would be better if the bracket for the nozzle wasn't broken; there's nowhere to put books or DVDs; and not really enough room for clothes. There's a large cupboard at the end of the sitting room, but it's only really good for hanging things in or for items such as towels. I need a chest-of-drawers. Chengdu feels more lively than Fuzhou ever did, although I note that there are lots of foreign tourists around. All the pretty girls? Well, there are some, but no more than anywhere else, it seems. Short shorts are on display, but that's no different from Fuzhou or Beijing.

Who's the boss? It seems that the whole matter of being ferried from the airport when you arrive and to it when you leave is a mere courtesy. Formally speaking, the people who actually employ me should be doing that, but the school has to do it in their stead. In other words, I'm on my own tomorrow when I depart. Do I have any regrets about leaving Fuzhou? A couple. One is that I never had a bike so that I could explore the city more widely. I think there's rather a lot that I missed seeing because of my comparative immobility, and once I knew I was departing, there was no point in getting a bike. The other is a couple of cute girls here, but since I'm told that the most beautiful girls in China live in Chengdu, I may find that there's ample compensation for that loss. (Yes, I know. I'm a sad old perv who knows that age, academic and cultural differences really preclude any chance of meaningful relationships here.)

Attitudes when foreigners depart. In a couple of days I'll be leaving Fuzhou. It wasn't my choice because although I said I had no objections to departing, I preferred to be spared the bother of packing everything up yet again for a second year running. Instead, Central Command asked me to go to Chengdu and I agreed. I'm still with the same programme, but at another school. I'm also still under contract. Unfortunately, the school's attitude, regardless of the circumstances of your departure, is that you're a dirty, traitorous scoundrel who deserves no help whatsoever. It doesn't matter one iota that you're still under the current contract. That's a contract which, throughout the time it covers, is used as a stick with which to beat you, but otherwise ignored when they don't think it's in their best interests. Every contract I've signed here has been violated by the schools to a greater or lesser extent. The people who actually employ us l...

It was in the phial marked "Secret Deadly Formula". There's a crackdown on Death STUMP and the usual suspects get rounded up. Lina invents some super deadly virus as a kind of nuclear deterrent, but her assistant (Igor?) pours the stuff down the drain. ( I thought it was old mayonnaise , he said apologetically. He was probably right, but I think it was yoghurt-based, since hippie tree-huggers like yoghurt, the most vile-tasting dairy product known to humanity and an apt base for some sort of 100%-lethal biological weapon.) But whose fault is this mess? Ultimately, it's Lina's fault. Firstly, it's obvious that Igor is some cheap factory second that she bought from Lackeys 'R' Us. Secondly, she should've labelled the phials and she should've at least ensured that Igor (one GCSE in Media Studies) could recognise what the label said. Thirdly, she should've locked the phials away in a secure cabinet where Igor couldn't get his hands on them....

It seemed like a good idea at the time. STUMP's leader, Mad Dog, notes, as I did yesterday, that e-Ville Corporation is faking it. The reforms are a con. It's time to get radical. That splits STUMP, and Lina, who still likes it hard and violent, becomes part of Death STUMP. Lina ends up making small bombs for STUMP which are used as incendiary devices. The bombs cause varying amounts of damage, but one seriously endangers the lives of the director of e-Ville and his family (resulting, I should think, in the wholesale dismissal of his security providers who let a bunch of bomb-wielding hippy tree-huggers get past them) and the fire that resulted from another, led to the death of a fireman. Lina isn't so bothered about the former, but she is about the latter. Nonetheless, they're saving lots of people in the Third World, so it's a small price to pay. Besides, can Lina be held responsible for the unintentional death of the fireman? Well, yes. I suppose that it might be...

If it works on a telly… e-Ville Corporation (yes, we're back to unreality) has climbed down on a few things such as stir-fired baby koalas and whole, roasted panda chunks, but it seems to be window undressing [sic!] more than anything else. To Lina it seems that mindless violence has achieved something, and it's time to kick some more skanky corporate arse. Lawrence, all sandals, memories of being a fluffy-headed Egyptian princess, and tripitaka (well, he saw the word once when he was glancing through the Dummies Guide to Buddhism ), decides that enough's enough. Is STUMP's new policy a success? e-Ville Corporation's response to STUMP really seems to be a matter of changing their image rather than altering their substance. STUMP, on the other hand, seems to be losing the moral high ground by resorting to force to achieve its ends. Or, perhaps more accurately, STUMP seems to be joining e-Ville Corporation. Well, the saying is If you can't beat 'em, join ...

The social problems of the Australian Aborigines. I thought I'd turn my attention to an ethical dilemma from the real-world. It's been reported in The Guardian ( Aboriginal abuse plan denounced as racist ) that the Australian government is trying to do something about alcoholism and child abuse in Aboriginal communities. The proposal is to ban alcohol and porn. The Australian PM, John Howard, is being accused of using this as a political opportunity since such measures are being taken ahead of a general election. The viability of the scheme has also been called into question. From what I've read in the past, the lives of Aborigines are pretty dreadful. I know that they have a low tolerance for alcohol. I didn't know about the child abuse part until I read the article from The Guardian. Regardless of the political circumstances, isn't it better that some effort should be made to alleviate the lot of Aborigines than that they should be left to pass their lives in such...